George Carlin, When Will Jesus Bring The Pork Chops?

Quotes

• “To my way of thinking, there is every bit as much evidence for theexistence of UFOs as there is for the existence of God...”
• “I think the warning labels on alcoholic beverages are too bland. They should be more vivid. Here is one I would suggest:...”
• “I'm not a person who thinks they can have it all, but I certainly feel that with a bit of effort and guile I should be a...”
• “Here's all you have to know about men and women: women are crazy, men are stupid. And the main reason women are crazy is...”
• “If no one knows when a person is going to die, how can we say he died prematurely?”