Stephen Colbert

Quotes

• “If this is going to be a Christian nation that doesn't help the poor, either we have to pretend that Jesus was just as s...”
• “Women don't want all that. Women just want a partner who is considerate and attentive, who will spoon with them while re...”
• “I used to make up stuff in my bio all the time, that I used to be a professional ice-skater and stuff like that. I found...”
• “I believe that the government that governs best is a government that governs least, and by these standards we have set u...”
• “If our Founding Fathers wanted us to care about the rest of the world, they wouldn't have declared their independence fr...”
• “There's nothing wrong with stretching the truth. We stretch taffy, and that just makes it more delicious.”
• “Wikipedia is the first place I go when I'm looking for knowledge... or when I want to create some.”
• “Atheism, a religion dedicated to its own sense of smug superiority.”